This week marked the end of some things and the beginning of others.
For the past 13 years, this has been my view every spring on my way in to work. I have served in a variety of positions - from claims examiner to fraud investigator, to business analyst, to technical specialist in systems management. Working for the government has often been boring as hell, but brought with it a sense of security, stability. Especially in these uncertain economic times, there is nothing like working for the Unemployment Office to make you understand the demand for your services. But regardless of career highs or lows, I always thought I'd stay there, and eventually retire from there. I used to refer to it as a "gilded cage", because even if I didn't always like the work I was doing, they paid just enough and had enough benefits to make going anywhere else pretty difficult. But don't misunderstand me, I have always been grateful for the work.
But Friday marked my last day there for a while, at any rate. I have taken a leave of absence in order to join a related organization for at least the next 6 months. If I like it and they like me, I may have the opportunity to work with them indefinitely. It's an opportunity to learn something entirely different, use my abilities in an entirely new way, and stretch my comfort zone a bit. And I'll get the chance to work with some really great people, too.
So leaving felt a bit surreal, but it also felt right.
I also let go of something else this week:
Yes, for first time in about 6 years, I am off BCPs. It also, is a bit nerve wracking. I want off of them because I want to see what my body is like on its own. Because if the Porphyria thing is a factor, BCPs are totally contraindicated. I figured it was a relatively simple thing I could do, and keep a close eye to see if it makes a difference on Smaug. In the back of my mind, though, there is also a "but". Because what if the BCPs have been helping keep the endo in check, and if I go off them, what if it comes back? So I'm only going off them for 3 months. And we'll see what happens.
I saw Dr. Love on Thursday. She supports coming off the BCPs for 3 months. She thinks it will take more than a month to see any effect, but the endo should be ok for that time period. She said 6 months would be be risking too much endo-wise, but 3 should be ok. So it's been 6 days thus far, and I've noticed at least one thing: my libido has definitely perked up. And so far, Smaug just seems a bit confused, unsure if he's supposed to sleep in or jump up and down on my ovary.
Dr. Love also prescribed a new medicine. It's supposed to be a medicine of last resort, and it will most assuredly knock me out, but it will give me some place to turn when I can't stand it anymore. So that's a good thing, hopefully.
So this week has seen the end of some pretty significant things, and opened some new doors. I'm nervous and excited about what's around the corner.
